The worls's funniest jokes

Argentina
An elderly couple goes to Burger King, where they carefully split a burger and fries. A trucker takes pity on them and offfers to buy the wife her own meal.
"It's alright," says the husband.
"We share everything."
A few minutes later, the trucker notices that the wife hasn't taken a bite. "I really wouldn't mind buying your wife her own meal," he insists.
"She'll eat," the husband assures him. "We share everything."
A few minutes later, the trucker notices that the wife hasn't take a bite. "I really won't mind buying your wife her own meal," he insists.
"She'll eat," the husband assures him. "We share everything."
Unconvinced, the trucker implores the wife, "Why aren't you eating?"
The wife snaps, "Because I'm waiting for the teeth!"

Czech Republic
A man calls a radio deejay and says,
"I've found a wallet with hundred thousand koruny inside. There's also a card that says 'Jan Ziegler, Seifert Street 3, Prague.'"
"So?" says the deejay. "What do you want us to do?"
"Would you be so kind as to play the man a song?"

Hungary
Doctor: Have you taken my advice and slept with the window open?
Patient: Yes.
Doctor: So your asthma dissapeared completely?
Patient: No, but my watch, TV, iPod and laptop have.

Mexico
Indians ask their new chief whether the winter will be cold or mild. Since the young chief never learned the ways of his ancestors, he tells them to collect fireword, then he goes off and calls the National Weather Service.
"Will the winter be bad?" he asks.
"Looks like it," is the answer.
So the chief tells his people to gather more firewood. A week later, he calls again. "Are you positive the winter will be very cold?"
"Absolutely."
The chief tells his people to gather even more firewood, then he calls the Weather Service again: "Are you sure?"
"I'm telling you, it's going to be the coldest winter on record."
"How do you know?"
"Because the Indians are gathering firewood like crazy!"

Switzerland
Wife: Honey, did you notice? I bought a new toilet brush.
Husband: Yes, I did. But I still prefer the paper.

Spain
A beggar appproaches a grandmother at the beach with his hands out.
"Please, senora," the poor man pleads, "I haven't eaten all day."
"Good," says the grandmother.
"Niow you won't have to worry about cramps when you go for a swim."

Taiwan
Papa Turtle is telling his son a bedtime story. "Once upon a time, there was a white bunny."
"Aw, c'mon, Dad," says the boy.
"That's kid stuff. What about some science fiction?"
"All right. Once upon a time, there was a bunny in outer space..."
"Dad! Make it more grown-up,"
"OK, OK, Promise you won't tell Mum."
"I swear."
"Once upon a time, there was a naked bunny..."

The Netherlands
A starlet is seated next to a lawyer on a long flight. She craves her sleep, but he keeping waking her up. "Let'slay a trivia game," he suggests. "If I answer wrong, I'll pay you $50. If you answer wrong, you owe me $5."
The starlet agrees, and the lawyer goes first. "What's the distance between the earth and the moon?"
The starlet hands the lawyer $5.
Now it's her turn. "What goes up a mountain on three legs and comes down on four?"
The lawyer is dumbstruck. He scans the internet, flips through his scientist he can find. No dice. Hours later, he wakes up the starlet, hands her $50, and asks, "So what's the answer?"
Without a word, she hands him $5 and goes back to sleep.

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